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"FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION IN THE INTERVIEW? NOT IF BRINGS OUT THE WORST OF YOU."

Dear Kathryn:

After twenty-two years of being a human resources manager, the day's arrived when I'm too ticked to tock. I don't want to do one more interview until I vent, so here it is.

As I can see from many of the people I interview and the letters I read in your column, today's job hunters have a huge shoulder-chip. Today's candidate is convinced an employer's out to discriminate against them and that we giggle about the personal idiosyncrasies they might have shared during the interview. They're insulted when salaries employers offer don't measure up to their inflated self-opinions but then whine they can't find a job. I've had it with these lofty-headed candidates and let me lay out why many aren't taken seriously and offered jobs. Here is my advice to today's job hunter.

*Whether it's a security blanket or you're addiction, turn off your dang cell phone-and I don't mean turn it to vibrate mode. Watching you squirm in your chair dealing with the vibration mode while peering to see who the call is from, is rude and unprofessional. It has me direct your resume towards the shredder.

*Don't tell me you left your last three jobs due to personal reasons and expect me to buy it. I'm not interested in the dirt of your personal life, however I do expect that a committed professional is intelligent enough to articulately explain why they left a job without feeling naked about the reason. Everyone experiences divorces, family deaths, hospitalizations etc. If the candidate hides themselves to such an extent that I can't get a read on them, I'm turned off. I will move on to a candidate that's more up front and easier to understand.

*Five minutes into the interview, don't ask me about the hours, how much overtime and details of the benefits. You don't even know about the jobs duties and you're in a thither as to what your medical contribution is going to be and when can you take vacation.

*I've said it before and will again, lose your kids, dogs and stupid voice messages on your cell and home phones. If you think it's a good expression of your "personality"-it's not. In addition of things to lose, leave your water bottle and coffee cup in your car. If you're here longer then an hour, we'll invite you to our water cooler.

*Come prepared , visit our website and know about what we do. The blank stare or answer, "the benefits" I get when I ask you "why you to work here", isn't impressive.

*Our application states we do background checks and drug testing. Don't put yourself or us through the process only to find your drug test positive (not the result we desire) or you've lied about your credentials. It's expensive and leaves a bad taste in one's mouth.

OK, I have said my piece. Hopefully, my next round of interviews tell me the truth about their salary history, remember what they've put on their resume and possess half the qualifications we've stated as mandatory for the job.

CONFIDENTIAL, PLEASE, Newington, CT

Dear "Confidential":

While some job hunters may not be enthusiastic at first reading regarding your comments, I hope they'll take each comment to heart. Being the recipient of thousands of employers feedbacks following candidates interviews, my ears are living proof that I've heard this commentary from many more employers then I wish I did. Thanks for speaking out, Newington.

Dear Kathryn:

I left my last two positions on ok terms, giving proper notice and leaving the work behind in order. When I left those positions I had asked my bosses if I could use them as a reference. They agreed and I figured I'd be safe to provide their names to future employers. Three years later and I've gotten reports back that three of my references are either strongly refusing to comment, one gave a mediocre reference and the other stated blatant lies.

I'm not only ticked, but confused. I called all three without a return call back. Quite frankly, I'd like to sue the one who said blatant lies about me.

What proof do I need to pursue this and what the heck can I do about references at this late stage? I'm buffaloed, especially when they agreed at the time I asked.

STEVE N., Vernon, CT

Dear Steve:

Let's look at a couple of things before investigating possible legal remedies.

First, it sounds like the last time you touched base with your references were when you left. In three years those employers have had many employees pass though their doors with more than a few bad experiences. It could also be that those that agreed to give you a reference years ago have had more restrictive policies regarding references put into place.

Secondly, it's a possibility that your reference people agreed to providing a reference without real thought. They could have discovered some substandard work you did following your departure and changed their tune about your "good performance." Immediately call the two references that declined to comment on the reference calls. Ask them what they would feel comfortable telling prospective employers. If their comments are positive, ask again permission to supply their names. Also, ask if they'd pen a few positive lines for you, asking if you could pick up the reference letter to use for some immediate interviews. This tactic of picking up the letters to use them on upcoming interviews will create a sense of urgency for the individuals to write them for you. If you ask them to mail you a reference letter it will be lucky if you ever see them.

Go to Google and search, "employment reference checking". Hundreds of reference checking services will surface. You'll have to pay for the service but you'll immediately uncover what reference of yours is saying "blatant lies". You'll be able to use this fact-finding and use their findings as grounds for the legal action you may take.

In the future, always call your references prior to them getting reference calls, politely asking for them to take the time for the call that may come. Be judicious passing out their names, no employer has time for hundred calls about previous employees. Last, get reference letters and copies of your reviews upon leaving. There's never a better time then when you're still on the employers turf to get what you'll surely need down the road.

Dear Kathryn:

Dear Kathryn: I've put my job search into high gear and am finding it more work then working! I've got three different versions of my resume, and four different cover letters and can't even keep track of which one I've sent where. I'm still working, and finding another job is like having an additional job. I would think that employers that are so hungry for good employees could read between the lines and I wouldn't have to spoon-feed them how each line in my resume relates to their job requirements. This is a drag.

Any suggestions on getting more interviews scheduled from the many resumes I'm emailing, faxing and have even overnighted? I even had this resume professionally prepared. I need to make a job move but need a more surefire way to present my credentials.

ANN-MARIE P., Vernon, CT

Dear Ann-Marie:

The efforts you're making now are not only crucial to any success you'll have in this job-hunt but, if done properly, your work will be rewarded two-fold. While my advice will require much better organization and more effort on your part, I predict much better success in the long run.

Here is what really occurs when your resume gets in front of the resume reviewer 1. It gets sixty seconds or less of an "analyzation" in which the reader determines which pile of three it goes into. Pile 1-"right on--schedule for an in-person interview." Pile 2-"remote possibility"-if nothing comes from those from Pile 1, I will look again at this pile." Pile 3- "Did this applicant even read my ad and understand the qualifications required?" Trash! Needless to say, there is no recovering once you've landed in Pile 3.

Now that you know the truth of what the resume receiver does with your resume and cover letter, here's what you can do to up your chances of your paperwork landing in Pile 1.

*First, understand that your "skills & qualifications" section must parallel what the employer's looking for or they'll lose interest before even scanning the remainder of your resume. If you're a graphic artist but have web design abilities as well as journalistic abilities, I can envision at least four different versions. One geared for corporate emphasizing graphic experiences relatable to corporate environment needs; one web-accomplishment oriented with companies and websites listed with the specific goals accomplished; Another still, emphasizing writing and graphic talents with short samples attached. Finally, a project oriented resume in response to employers seeking results oriented professionals. *Cover letters should be responsive to the ad. It's vital you keep good records, attaching the ad to the resume you submitted so that you follow up appropriately, noting dates to re-contact.

*Forget objectives that focus on growth, money, which next job you want and the "me-me" list. Objectives in my book can get you into more trouble than they are worth.